"After getting married, what relationship is the most difficult?"

To this question, at least nine out of ten people will answer that it is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

It has to be said that the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is really one of the most difficult conflicts in the five thousand years of history of our country. A young daughter-in-law meets a powerful mother-in-law, or a weak mother-in-law is bullied by an evil daughter-in-law. Various versions of the story are played out in many families every day.

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Happy Dating Agency.

After Hu Jinhua and Liu Lian went out, Jiang Feng said to Kang Buping, who was sitting across from him: "Mr. Kang, first tell me from your perspective what is the main conflict between your mother and your wife?"

Kang Buping said with a sad face: "Master Jiang, in fact, in my eyes, their conflicts are caused by trivial things in daily life.

For example, there are differences in diet. My ancestors are from Guangdong Province. Although my grandfather’s generation moved to Gan Province, the eating habits passed down from generation to generation cannot be easily changed. Cantonese cuisine is mainly light, basically

No chili pepper.

As for my wife, she is from Gan Province and enjoys everything.

Therefore, since my wife married into my family, she has ordered takeout every now and then.

So the conflict arose. My mother felt that the food she had worked so hard to prepare was just there, and my wife not only refused to eat it, but also had to spend extra money to order takeout. She really didn't know how to run a household.

As for my wife, she also feels that my mother cooks tasteless meals all day long and never gets enough to eat. She spends money ordering takeout and has to be scolded. She has no freedom at all."

Jiang Feng asked: "Then have you ever tried to persuade him?"

Kang Buping sighed: "Of course I tried to persuade her and asked my mother to learn to cook some local dishes. Unfortunately, my mother's cooking skills were mediocre and the taste of the newly learned dishes was really unflattering. My wife is

After trying it two or three times, I stopped eating it. Then my mother stopped doing it, and things inevitably went back to square one."

Jiang Feng nodded and asked, "Besides the difference in diet, what other reasons are there?"

Kang Buping said: "There is also the process from my wife's pregnancy to the birth of the child. My mother will adhere to the ideas of the older generation. This can't be eaten, that can't be eaten, this can't be done, that can't be done. In short, the control is relatively lenient.

And pregnant women have bad tempers, so naturally they have a lot of arguments.

After the child was born, there were even more conflicts.

In short, they quarreled every now and then, and every time they quarreled, the two of them would expose each other's shortcomings and quarrel over all the old things from the past, which really annoyed me!"

Jiang Feng said understandingly: "It is really not easy for a man to be caught between a mother and a daughter-in-law. He is always under the dilemma and double pressure of 'marrying a wife and forgetting your mother' and 'living with me or living with your mother'"

, it’s like walking a tightrope, if you’re not careful you will lose your balance.”

Kang Buping said with deep helplessness: "Who says it's not the case? Once they have a dispute, whoever I help will be wrong. At first, I tried to persuade this person to persuade that person, but later I found that it didn't have any effect, so I just took it as my responsibility.

The ostrich rose.

Whenever they have a dispute, I will stay as far away as possible.

In fact, I know it’s not good to do this, but I really don’t have the ability to resolve their disputes, so I can only choose to escape.”

Jiang Feng nodded and said, "I understand. You go to the hall and wait first, and call your wife in by the way."

Kang Buping said hello, then opened the door and went out.

Soon, his wife Liu Lian opened the door and came in.

Jiang Feng asked her to sit down and went straight to the topic: "Ms. Liu, your husband just told me about the problems between you and your mother-in-law. Now I want to understand the problems between you and your mother-in-law from your perspective.

How did the contradiction arise? Where are your contradictions? Can you give some examples?"

Liu Lian thought for a while and said: "I feel that my mother-in-law just likes to pick on me. I am not used to eating the dishes she cooks. Many times I don't even have any appetite at all. I just force myself to eat. Others enjoy eating, but I eat."

It's like suffering.

Sometimes when I’m not full and I’m really hungry, I just order my favorite takeaway.

Every time my mother-in-law sees it, she makes a stinky face and makes me feel full without eating!

Also, my mother-in-law is too meddlesome.

For example, she asks us to go to bed early and get up early like her. I know she does it for our own good, but how many young people today can do it?

Also, when I was pregnant, my mother-in-law strictly forbade me from eating chili peppers, saying what would happen to the fetus if I ate chili peppers. However, I have always disliked spicy food since I was a child, and there is no saying among us that you are not allowed to eat chili peppers when you are pregnant.

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In addition to chili peppers, there were other things to eat, and I was not allowed to eat this or that. It made my pregnancy more uncomfortable than being in jail. I don’t even know how I survived at that time.

Then there was the birth of the child. During my confinement period, I had to take care of the child. Although my mother-in-law also helped take care of the child, she did this and that all day long, and the child was left to me most of the time.

When her children were sick, she didn't rush to take them to the doctor, but used her home remedies to treat them.

When the child started eating rice lake, I told her not to blow or taste it with her mouth, but she just didn't take it seriously.

When the child is crying, I ask her not to hug her in a hurry, but she doesn’t listen. When I ask her not to hug the child when she is coaxing him, she is shaking around, but she doesn’t listen...

In short, when my child was growing up, she and I could argue every day.

The most terrible thing is that my mother-in-law is also a talkative woman. When she gets together with the grandmothers and aunts in the community, she will scold me for this and that in front of outsiders. Every time her words reach my ears, I will be angry to death.

There is also express delivery. Although I receive a lot of express delivery, they are all cheap goods bought online, and everything is useful.

Then my mother-in-law said I was a prodigal...

Anyway, she and I really don't get along, so it would be a miracle if we didn't quarrel for three days together."

Jiang Feng listened to Ms. Liu constantly criticizing her mother-in-law for all kinds of faults, with a tone that was sometimes aggrieved and sometimes angry. Jiang Feng basically heard that, as Mr. Kang said, it was all trivial matters.

But as the saying goes, "If small grievances are not forgiven, big grievances will arise." It is also said that "three feet of ice does not freeze in a day." If these trivial things accumulate in the heart and cannot be resolved, problems will naturally arise.

It's getting more and more serious.

After Liu Lian finished speaking, Jiang Feng nodded and said, "Ms. Liu, I basically understand what you said. Next, you go out of the hall and wait, and call your mother-in-law in by the way."

Liu Lian responded, then opened the door and went out.

Soon, my mother-in-law Hu Jinhua opened the door and came in.

Jiang Feng waited for her to sit down, and also got straight to the point and asked her to tell the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from her perspective.

From Hu Jinhua's point of view, the story is different. She said: "My daughter-in-law doesn't know how to run a house. There is nothing I cook that she likes to eat, and she doesn't want to cook it herself, so she always orders takeout."

, it’s a complete waste of money.

In addition, I shop online every day, and there are endless express deliveries every day. I have no ability to make money, and I spend all my money. Even if I say a few words to her, she is still not happy.

Then when she was pregnant, I told her not to eat this or that. It was all for the good of her and the baby, but she didn't appreciate it and thought I was meddling in my own business.

After the child was born, I had to buy groceries, cook, clean, do laundry, take care of the children, and take care of her as a mother-in-law. I was so busy that I never had a moment to spare, but she still complained that I didn't help her. She was like a wolf.

The main conflict is still with my grandson. She always has trouble with me, as if I, a grandmother, don’t care for my grandson. She keeps talking about what this expert said and that expert said all day long, saying that I am wrong.

That's not good.

I, Hu Jinhua, gave birth to three children and raised them. Plus the experience passed down from generation to generation, how can she compare? As for what experts are, I don’t know. I only know the three children I brought up in this way.

, they all grew up healthy and without any problems."

Hu Jinhua was very angry when talking about her daughter-in-law. It was obvious that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law had become very tense due to long-term quarrels.

As the saying goes, 'accumulating love becomes blessing, accumulating resentment becomes disaster'.

If the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law continue to quarrel like now, the quarrel may get serious one day, and impulsiveness will lead to tragic disasters. Such extreme examples are not uncommon.

While the three of them were telling the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from their own perspectives, Jiang Feng was also checking their information to verify whether they were lying. He could easily figure out the crux of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?

After listening to Hu Jinhua's story, Jiang Feng smiled at her and said, "Thank you, Ms. Hu, for your story. Please go out of the hall and wait for me for ten minutes. I will first comprehensively evaluate the difficulty of your mediation, and then talk to you about the charging issue."

"Well, okay!" Hu Jinhua responded, then opened the door and walked out of the mediation room.

Jiang Feng quickly read through the information of the three people and confirmed that the disputes between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law were all trivial and there were no irreconcilable conflicts.

And the main reason why they have reached this point is still "discord".

The reason why some mother-in-law and daughter-in-law don't get along well is not necessarily due to personality reasons, but the natural opposition between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. If the relationship between the two is not that of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, perhaps their personalities can become friends.

But Hu Jinhua and Liu Lian really have incompatible personalities. Even if they are not mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, they will never get along.

This can be seen from the marriage matching value of Kang Buping and Liu Lian:

[Current marriage matching value] 56 (husband and wife relationship 62 + well-matched pair 68 + family relationship 38)

[Extreme Marriage Matching Value] 60 (husband and wife relationship 69 + well-matched pair 71 + family relationship 40)

The extreme matching value of this family relationship is only 40 points, which shows that the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are really at odds by nature. It is basically useless to use other mediation methods. After all, the limit is there.
Chapter completed!