It was four years ago, when Xu Yan was fifteen years old, his parents died unexpectedly. Xu Yan, who had been struggling in the Xu family, lost his father's bond and became a person who wandered outside the Xu family. He did not seem to think too much about his situation. He was like an adult, following the funeral procedure without shedding a tear to send his parents away.

After burying his parents, the funeral did not end, and countless people came to pay their respects. Xu Yan was just standing in the mourning hall, talking to the mourning dolls for thanking, and doing what a child with a mature mind should do.

Then, fewer people were mourning, and he left the mourning hall, went to the yard, and sat alone.

At that time, he didn't know what Xu Yan was thinking. He only remembered that the bench was very cold at that time, which made him feel real about whether it was a dream or reality now.

As he was traveling through reality and dreams, his mental mood was still ups and downs under his cold and thin appearance. At this time, a man came over and sat beside him.

The man was very tall. When he sat down, his black suit brought a warmth from himself, mixed with the faint smell of cigarettes, and the clarity of smell made Xu Yan's ups and downs capture some real feelings, and his heart and body were falling heavily.

So when the man left, he grabbed the corner of his clothes.

He asked him to accompany him again.

He looked at the man standing in front of him. After hearing his request, the man didn't say much. He just looked at him with his eyes down. Xu Yan didn't know if he had cried at that time, but he felt a little cold in the corners of his eyes.

The man sat down again.

After he sat down, Xu Yan's heart and body fell as if he had stopped falling. There was a cliff under his feet, which was dark. His fingers grabbed the corner of the man's clothes so that he could not fall into the cliff of the abyss.

It took Xu Yan almost a quarter of an hour to stabilize his emotions. He also took a quarter of an hour to inform his parents of death.

People cannot live in the past, they must live with time.

After being called by the Xu family, Xu Yan let go of the corner of the man's clothes. He didn't even say thank you and separated from him.

When we meet again, we are on the terrace of Suo Yu Villa.

Because of the death of his parents, Xu Yan grafted his emotions on Lin Xun. After grafting it on Lin Xun, it continued to accumulate and catalyze, and finally he developed a love for Lin Xun. Lin Xun hated men's love. Xu Yan was addicted to the love given to him by Lin Xun and Lin Xun's family, and hid this love deeply.

The hidden feelings do not mean that they are gone. Instead, they are more intense, distorted, and sensitive. Even one or two inadvertent words in Lin Xun would poke his heart like a knife.

He has always been self-treatment and self-disguised. Unexpectedly, on the terrace, Suo Yu in the dark saw through his disguise and even helped him recuperate.

Compared to Suo Yu's kindness, Xu Yan was more afraid that Suo Yu would see through his disguise. He was Lin Xun's uncle. He was worried that Suo Yu would tell Lin Xun about this, so he left silently. He thought that silence represents denial, but he did not expect that Suo Yu revealed this matter and left him without any hiding, but at the same time he was willing to help him hide this matter.

At this time, Xu Yan was grateful to Suo Yu, but was more afraid. He knew that he liked Lin Xun, and it seemed like a handle in Suo Yu's hands, and he could control him at will.

This fearful and glad days lasted not long.

Xu Yan intuitively observed the intimacy between Lin Xun and Ye Zhilin, and lost his composure after being drunk in a big adventure. He mistakenly treated Suo Yu as Lin Xun and kissed him. After learning about this from Lin Xun the next day, Xu Yan felt that the hanging baffle on the bottom of his feet had finally been opened, and he finally fell down.

The consequences of this matter were not only the breakdown of Lin Xun's relationship with him, but also the disgust of Suo Yu for him. Xu Yan even thought about his lonely life.

But what he didn't expect was that he bumped into Suo Yu's secret.

In other words, Suo Yu didn't care about being hit by him.

After being kissed by him, Suo Yu did not live in the villa. It was not because of disgust, but went to the hotel to find someone to relieve his desires and desires. He did not take it seriously about his kiss.

For Suo Yu, he is no longer the age to take it to heart after a night's sleep, not to mention that he just received a kiss.

Xu Yan is not very clear about Suo Yu's attitude at that time. He may have been relieved most of it, but there is another part of his emotions.

It is precisely because of this other part of the emotions that they directly established the relationship between the two of them in the garden of Lin Xun’s family.

Xu Yan kissed Suo Yu at that time because Suo Yu was like Lin Xun, and he could regard Suo Yu as Lin Xun. As an adult man, Suo Yu also had desires that need to be relieved, so he could be a tool to relieve his desires.

There is nothing better for each other than the two of them.

After determining the relationship, they continued to develop.

The first time was asked by Suo Yu, but in fact it was Xu Yan's initiative. Suo Yu left him with the blank space time he regretted, but he didn't know that it was the time for the blank space that made him feel the emotions from Suo Yu for the first time besides panic, guilty, and worry.

He felt a sense of peace of mind.

This sense of peace of mind comes from the tenderness Suo Yu exudes to him inadvertently.

Xu Yan accepted this tenderness, and he entangled, indulged, squeezed, and finally penetrated to the present.

Xu Yan thought, maybe if he wanted to separate from Suo Yu, he would have to cut his soul into pieces.

The animation is still playing.

Now, the part of the Hot Spring Villa has been played. The part of the Hot Spring Villa is also the beginning of Xu Yan's dependence on Suo Yu.

Because he was tired and had a fever, he could not contact Lin Xun when he went back to his room, so he contacted Suo Yu. Not long after he hung up the phone, Suo Yu carried him to the hospital.

He held his hand and stayed with him in the hospital all night. However, when Xu Yan woke up the next day, he had already left early because of work.

When Xu Yan saw that he was not here, he felt a little empty. It was not big, just the size of a needle hole. When Lin Xun told him that Suo Yu was leaving in the morning, Xu Yan was suddenly filled.

At that time, Xu Yan didn't like Suo Yu very much, so Lin Xun asked him if he would help him thank his uncle, and Xu Yan said he would thank him himself.

After almost getting better, Xu Yan went to find Suo Yu and thanked him for what he liked.

Xu Yan felt that at this time, he was still very sensible and knew what Suo Yu liked, and then gave him something.

However, his sensibility did not last long. At night, Xu Yan was lying on his bed and tossing and turning. He didn't know what was missing. Anyway, he had to Suo Yu to help him make up for it, so he went to find Suo Yu again.

Do nothing, just sleep with him.

As far as their relationship is concerned, this is an unreasonable request. Suo Yu can reasonably refuse, but he did not. Not only that, in order to accompany him, he also took the computer and returned to work in the bedroom. His work did not last long. After Xu Yan's repeated interruptions, in the end, the two people who each took the need were lying on a bed and did nothing.

Suo Yu handed him his hand.

When holding Suo Yu's hand, Xu Yan felt that the missing part met. He held Suo Yu's hand and fell asleep quickly as if he had a high fever.

The next day, Suo Yu had already left and left him the first breakfast he had made for him.

Xu Yan was filled with satisfaction at that time, and even some sweetness emerged. He didn't know why, but he felt that he was with Suo Yu, as if in addition to the pleasure of his body, his heart and spirit were also being filled.

Suo Yu went to Incheon on a business trip.

Not far away, Xu Yan spoke with him a text message. He was chatting with him, but it seemed like every word was thought carefully. Suo Yu said he would come back as soon as possible, and Xu Yan's connection with him was blank for a while.

It's like an intermission, laying the groundwork for what happens later and changes.

The anime continues to play, and it is grandpa’s birthday.

Xu Yan's meaning to the Xu family is his grandfather's needs for him. His grandfather usually lives in a sanatorium, and his spirit is good most of the time, so the old man is invisible and heartless about his appearance that looks like his father. And the old man also has fragile times when he is in a trance, such as on his 80th birthday, the old man called him home, and he went back.

The Xu family is not a home for Xu Yan, it is a building or an empty shell. In this home, no one is connected with him. He stands up like a transparent work of art. Only when the old man is in a trance, he is painted and brought to everyone.

Regarding his existence, it is not just an internal discussion of the Xu family. When my grandfather took his father home, the three of them had long become a laughing stock in the upper class in Beicheng. When his parents died, his son inherited his father's business and inherited these dirty words.

Xu Yan grew up in this language environment since childhood and has already had a certain degree of patience for ordinary words. However, when talking about his father, his young and energetic body will always be out of control.

Xu Yan was not mature enough to be tolerant or long-term plan, but this was also the young man's intention. He made a fuss at the old man's birthday party, slapped the guests, and finally got a slap from Xuchang City. He returned it. When he left, Xuchang City wanted to pull him, but was grabbed by Suo Yu who suddenly appeared.

Originally, from the time Suo Yu went to Incheon, to Lin Xun and Ye Zhilin celebrate Christmas, to the time when his grandfather treated him as his father and let him eat three tea eggs, to the time when he heard his father being insulted, to the time when he was slapped by Xuchang City, he could digest all these things, but at the moment when he saw Suo Yu, Xu Yan's strong heart seemed to have finally been uncovered with a messy scar, and his eyes immediately turned red.

Suo Yu said that Xuchangcheng would not feel sorry for hitting his child, which means that he is his child. Does he feel sorry for him?

Xu Yan thought.

Later, Suo Yu took him out of the banquet hall and arrived in his car. Suo Yu drove the air conditioner in the car, and Xu Yan's body was warmed up. He didn't know why Suo Yu appeared here or why he took him away. He blew the warm air from the air conditioner and talked to him about what happened today.

When he saw Suo Yu in the banquet hall, his messy scars were uncovered. While walking towards the car with Suo Yu, Xu Yan forced the scars to blur the scars again. But who knew that the warm wind blew his body and blew away the scars on his heart again.

Xu Yan's emotions instantly fell into a state of indulgence that he could not extricate himself.

He has never felt so wronged.

I have never doubted it or told anyone else.

In fact, during the time when his parents died, he thought about dying with his parents, but that was not what his parents hoped. He didn't want him to do things that disappointed them after his parents died, so he lived strongly.

But living strong is a very difficult thing, especially no one loves him.

They all say that when a person is lonely, he seems to be isolated by the whole world. However, Xu Yan feels that he seems to have created this world. In this world, he does not belong to the same element as any thing and any person.

He could not communicate with them or contact them, so he just observed the world so blankly and coldly.

After he asked that, Suo Yu hugged him and told him that he loved him, would he love him?

good.

Even though he knew that he was trying to comfort him or that love was out of pity for a child, when Suo Yu said he loved him, he felt that the world he was observing seemed to have a gap, and he could enter that gap and integrate into this world.

That night, Suo Yu loved him very much.

He prepared Christmas gifts for him, he wiped his hair, and he carried him back to the room to let him hold his hand to fall asleep. But Xu Yan didn't want to fall asleep simply.

He tied a bow on his pajamas, placed Suo Yu's hand on the bow, and asked him to take apart the gift he gave him.

That night, Xu Yan was loved by Suo Yu many times.

The next day, Suo Yu left again.

Just like last time, he left a post-it note for him and made breakfast for him. Originally, he should have felt sweet as last time. But when he saw the post-it note and breakfast, Xu Yan looked at the empty room, got up and put on his clothes and left Suo Yu's house.

He felt like he swallowed a bomb.

He kept silent, suppressing the smell of gunpowder, went to class as usual, and went to the library. Finally, when he learned from Lin Xun that Suo Yu was back last night and was going back for a morning meeting this morning, Xu Yan's bomb exploded at Suo Yu.

Suo Yu came back for him, he knew. Whether he expected him to be beaten by Xuchang City at his birthday party, Suo Yu would come back, he knew his situation in the Xu family.

So he came back overnight, left the next morning, and even made him breakfast.

Why did he do this?

Xu Yan felt that he understood something. Although he didn't understand thoroughly, he knew that he could call Suo Yu, make unreasonable trouble, and question him.
To be continued...